People Who Can’t Drive

I offer this simple solution for reducing the number of accidents on our roads.
The current crop of ‘driver educators’ need to stop teaching their students just the basic skills needed to pass the current joke of a driving test – instead giving them the same workover as what is required by those wishing to hold a licence to operate a heavy vehicle in most states.

Why is it the NSW Workplace Health and Safety Act proclaims I need to attend an ‘induction’ – often over a few hours – and effectively prove I have a solid and substantial knowledge of the safety rules and regulations of a given site in order to work there? Answer: To protect not only myself but other people and the environment from harm. How is it then, that all I need do to get approval to singlehandedly end the life of another person is to:
– produce a diary (easily forged) to show I’ve spent a certain number of hours behind the wheel of a car under supervision of a fully licensed driver,
– prove I can read a few traffic signs,
– go for a ‘lap around the block’ to reverse park, indicate when I’m turning a corner, travel at the speed limit within a safe distance of other vehicles, and respect the road rules?
This ‘examination’ is a complete joke, with the average candidate in and out of the motor registry as a fully independent licence holder within 45 minutes!

To get my Class MR licence I had to take part in six hours tutoring, all whilst being thoroughly examined on my knowledge and skills with vehicle operations, how to handle emergency situations, completion of ‘log books’ et cetera. Most notably, I had to prove my ability to manoeuvre the vehicle safely throughout the road network, in differing traffic conditions, according to the rules and regulations of the road. Then, in order to get my Heavy Rigid truck licence I went through a similar level of testing, instruction and assessment. With that in mind, I believe the RMS need to cut out the one-off 20 minute ‘test’ for a car licence and replace it with no less than five one hour practical examination sessions, with a different qualified tutor/examiner for each session. The candidate will then need to get no less than a 95% ‘score’ from each examiner, before being awarded a Provisional licence with similar conditions to today’s ‘red P’ plater. This will undoubtedly make our roads safer by effectively eliminating the proliferation of new drivers who simply do not know how to operate a vehicle. In the meantime, penalties for all driving offences – including not holding a valid licence – should be increased by no less than 25% across the board. As for’Double Demerit’ periods? The scheme should be expanded to include more offences, and also the doubling of all associated penalties.

Want to reduce the road toll? Make getting a licence much more difficult, and more expensive, by making the testing of candidates more stringent. Then, let people know if they have proven they’re worthy of a licence to be in charge of a ‘lethal weapon’, their hip pocket will be stung hard and their ‘right to drive’ will be rescinded if they take that licence for granted!


Samsung’s Stupid Business Practices

To those at Samsung Australia, I say this:
Stop worrying so much about when Phone Y is getting new firmwares after Phone X gets it. Instead, concentrate on the most important thing: the fact that every single Phone X owner doesn’t get the latest update at the same time!
S6 and S6 Edge owners throughout India have had Marshmallow for their ‘I’ devices since 16th March, and are now receiving a newer firmware version as I type. I know there’s a smaller population than India’s in Australia, but we’re certainly not smaller than many of the other nations that have now been enjoying Marshmallow goodness ON THE VERY SAME DEVICE for over a month!!!!

Samsung have more model variants of their devices than are necessary, which results in delays to firmware updates as the new OS version is adapted to each specific model variant. Instead of releasing one device for all nations, they release the 920F, the 920I, the 920K, the 920L, the 920T, etc. etc. etc. Not only that, there’s approximately 20 different other phone models released at the same time! In the meantime over in Cupertino, Tim Cook says, okay here’s the flagship iPhone 6 that every country in the world will use, here’s an iPhone 6+ thats the same phone but with a bigger screen, here’s a base model iPhone 6C for people that can’t afford the flagships, and when we update the iOS version for those devices, y’all are getting it pushed to your phone for free within 48 hours!
Now Samsung, we know your devices are damn fine, and we know Android OS is damn fine too, but people are going to desert you in droves if you don’t:
(a) understand the philosophy that ‘less is more’,
(b) reduce the ridiculous range of devices you manufacture,
(c) concentrate on the success of two moderately expensive flagships plus no more than three affordable alternatives, and
(d) release your firmware updates without the ridiculous and unjustified delays which owners have had to tolerate for the past three years due to your company spreading itself too thinly across the marketplace.

Surely you’re not that stupid you can’t recognise that having 20+ phone models with no less than 10 ‘regional variants’ for each one makes for a much larger job for you to do upgrading them all?

Here’s the solution, release ONLY the following: Galaxy S8, Galaxy S8 Edge, Galaxy Note 6, Galaxy Note 6 Edge, and no more than three cheaper and lower spec devices, eg: the Galaxy Y (with Edge variant) and a completely basic handset for users not wanting or able to afford a ‘smartphone’.
Its YOUR phone, and its about time YOU dictated to the network service providers and the world this message: “Here’s our phone, we’ve built it to work on every known telecoms and wi-fi network, but if it doesn’t on yours that’s your fault and you’ll have pissed off potential subscribers jumping ship to a network that Does support it.”
It’s what Steve Jobs said to the world’s telecoms network providers when Apple released the first iPhone, and look at what its done for their company! Don’t you think its about time you did the same, and bring an end to these absolutely ludicrous and totally preventable delays?

‘Work For The Dole’ Schemes

The Work For The Dole (WFD) Scheme in its current form needs to be scrapped immediately, as corrupt business practices and a lack of adherence to basic Workplace Health and Safety legislation become the order of the day.  How dare we even suggest that the Federal Government have any concern for the lives of those they consider to be nothing more than dumb dole bludgers?
The LNP have no respect whatsoever for anyone that doesn’t serve their purpose, increase their bank balance or make them look good, so why the hell would they care about a bloke competing with 2500 other applicants holding the same qualifications and experience every time he puts his name down for a job? Why the hell would they care about the guy who had built up those qualifications and experience over a 25+ year career, only to be forced to use them for less than what industry value them at?

For those of us over the age of 40 who are unemployed, our self-worth is lowered the moment we walk into a Centrelink office to effectively beg for assistance, but we certainly don’t need to have both our status rubbed into our faces and our careers completely denigrated by a scheme which does not place the safety of participants as its first priority. More often than not, the people in charge of ‘Whatever‘ project have no experience whatsoever in the industry that project is aligned with. As a result, those (seemingly) ‘in charge’ put at risk the safety and well-being of all participants, by enforcing guidelines generated by a committee that comprises public servants who have never in their lifetime had anything to do with that industry by either participation or association. I’m sure that when you’re operating a 240V hammer drill, or a chainsaw, or a piece of machinery or equipment you’ve never seen before, you’d take as Gospel instructional advice from a pen-pusher that has (since leaving their drug and alcohol fuelled college lives behind) spent the last three years of their working lives sitting at a computer screen playing Solitaire or updating Facebook, and the rest of their time heating up Lite&Easy meals, watching Downton Abbey and reading Jackie Collins novels.

In the meantime, those privately owned companies hired to run the Government’s ‘Job Network’ maintain a corrupt and clandestine ship of bureaucratic greed and profiteering. A recent ABC-TV investigation found that inappropriate payments were being made to individuals and organisations that no longer existed, along with full financial support for WFD projects that weren’t even commenced or completed. Check out the story at:

All of the above adds further weight to those wanting the abolition of Human Services policies and reforms created by the Liberal Party, the Nationals or indeed the Greens and the Democrats. The corruption is rife, the mismanagement is clear to see, the profiteering and selfish greed is off the scale; but most importantly, if these Work For The Dole schemes have zero concern for the health and safety of those left with no choice but to participate, then they must be shut down immediately. Losing one life is simply one too many…

With Thanks to Hairy…

An Open Letter to Bill Morrow

This is an open letter to Bill Morrow, the current Commander-in-Chief of the largest fuckup this country has ever seen since James Cook first saw Botany Bay:

I invite you, Mr. Morrow, and anyone else reading this to look at journalist Renai LeMay‘s recent Delimiter article highlighting the most recent failures of yourself and the company entrusted with the future technical direction of an entire continent.

Um, Earth to Bill? Earth to Bill? You asked Labor to provide a “good explanation”?
Well, they’ve got one!

What you’ve created in today’s National Broadband Network, Bill, is an absolute waste of public funds that goes nowhere near providing the economic and social benefits it was intended to. The “good explanation” is simply as follows:

  • Even though the expenditure outlay would be relatively close to, if not fractionally more than what the LNP have wasted since implementing the Multi-Technology Mix in late 2013, the Labor FTTP plan would by now have a greater number of homes and businesses connected to a faster, more reliable and economically efficient network;
  • As of today your ‘rollout’ is running behind the very schedule you yourself announced, due to FTTN brownfields taking up as much (and in many cases more) man-hours and resources to both construct and provision optimised services;
  • Labor certainly wouldn’t have implemented a ‘Jobs For The Boys’ regime in terms of the directorship of NBNCo, where the LNP have put in charge two of Australia’s most despised and ridiculed telco executives to negotiate deals using public money with their former privately owned employers, and
  • Labor wouldn’t have wasted the best part of $20 billion in taxpayer dollars on hardware they would never have needed, such as
  1. Telstra’s copper + HFC,
  2. Alcatel-Lucent DSLAMs,
  3. Optus HFC cables,
  4. electricity to power the node boxes, and
  5. multi-year contracts to repair the dilapidated and unserviceable Telstra/Optus hardware that was purchased sight unseen.

While you were head of Vodafone Australia, customers left you in droves as you installed second-rate hardware which consistently broke down. You then got in touch with the people you believe to be your mates, your former employers Vodafone UK, who themselves told you directly that

  1. they were so fucken glad you’d left,
  2. they were only just now recovering from the shitfight you left behind, and
  3. you were totally braindead to think that a To-Node network was better than that which full fibre to client infrastructure can provide in terms of both economic and real-time quality.

You then went over to America to check out a telco that’s got more subscribers under it’s left toe than the population of Australia, and you called them liars to their faces when they told you the very same thing I.T. experts across the globe have been saying to you and your buddy Malcolm for the last three fucken years:


The FTTN hardware you’ve spread across the land like a cancer was only intended (in Labor’s plan) to cover difficult-to-reach regional areas, where the costs of putting in full fibre was prohibitive and fixed wireless wouldn’t provide a quality service.
As for your mate Ziggy (Switkowski, former CEO of Telstra during one of its worst periods for customer dissatisfation in its history), you fail to mention his direct involvement as CEO of NBNCo. in the deal to hand over (what is now) almost $15 billion to his former privately owned employer for a product he knew full well wasn’t worth pissing on! Do you realise that Telstra and Optus are putting in their pockets the scrap value of the very hardware you’re paying them to replace, After you went and bought them almost a billion dollars worth of new copper and HFC cables to fix their shoddy junk? With that, don’t you fucken dare even mention the word “corruption“!

Need any further “explanation” beyond that, you raving lunatic? Wake up to yourself, Bill, and pray the Australian voting public ignore the stupidity your dickhead Coalition mates have shown over the past three years, because I can bet you any money you like that if Labor win the upcoming election, they’ll boot you out of NBNCo. so fast your head will be spinning for a fucken month!

With Thanks to Hairy…

Hung Parliament? Typical fucktard Aussie muppets!

There’s a bit of talk around the traps that we may end up with a ‘hung parliament’ – meaning neither the Coalition or Labor have enough seats to form a majority Government – following the next election. I have to say, if we do end up in that political mess, it will prove to me once and for all just how ignorantly stupid most people in this country are.
Not only Malcolm Turnbull personally but the entire Coalition Caucus have consistently proven over the past three years they have no care or concern for anything except increasing the gap between the rich and poor. Their policy decisions show quite clearly how they’re willing to let our blue collar and primary industries die, our public education and health systems suffer, the wages of the working class stagnate and the cost of living for those who can least afford it increase. In the meantime, Turnbull and his ‘party faithful’ are bending over backwards to protect the exuberance of multinational companies, their corporate buddies and their own delusions of grandeur. Even Blind Freddy should be able to see how misguided and completely fucked in the head these so-called ‘intellectuals’ have become!
Sadly, there’s people that just don’t care about political process, and those who wish to sit idly by and ignore the ravings of a man who can see his grasp on the Prime Ministership he slashed and burned his way into, slipping. The fall of Turnbull will be massive, as his suspect business activities, his ridiculous policy choices come to light. You ignore the signs at both the perils of yourself and the country, because I can honestly say (based on the shitfight of the Howard Years) a vote for the LNP is a vote for more of the same and worse.
Those who choose to waste their vote on a party whose members believe in destroying the very industries this nation was built on should have their right to cast that vote removed immediately. If you wish to sit idly by and watch this country go even further down the toilet under a LNP Government, you’re either too rich to want change or too fucken stupid to realise you’re getting screwed into the ground. Thing is, if Malcolm gets the guernsey you’ll have two groups to blame:
(i) those fucktards who wasted their chance to bring about change, and
(ii) the rich pricks who don’t give a fuck about anything but the size of their own wallets.
With Thanks to Hairy…

Another rant about fucktard extremists

The Australian government over the past ten years or so have let slip into this country an incredibly high number of Islamic extremists and terrorist ‘sleeper agents’. What we have here now in Australia are an ever-increasing number of terrorist sympathisers that have used our nation’s generosity and freedoms to propagate their own evil and despicable plans. Look at those who have gone on to set up money laundering schemes and clandestine operations (eg: the Halal Certification Board) to fund their war against the infidels, while they sit here waiting for some fucktard over in Afghanistan or Iraq to order them to strap bombs to their chests, walk into a local train station and kill people that are merely trying to feed and house their families.

Each and every week we’re seeing more and more people from the Middle East arriving in Australia and demanding we conform it to what they’ve left behind. If the country they were born in has a way of life that’s so fucken great that they want those same rules and regulations here, why don’t they go back to their bombed out dust bowls and leave us alone to enjoy what we’ve built here? Better still, why don’t they come here and change how They live to suit Our rules and lifestyle, just like they’d expect us to do if we moved to Their country? Oh, I know why. Australia offers opportunities that their fucked up part of the world hasn’t got because of their stupidly idiotic ‘religion’. Thing is, something that’s borne from hatred and tyrrany will never stop producing offspring filled with the same belief that its their right to dictate how we all live and what we all believe in.

What we as non-Muslims need to do is wake the fuck up and fight them at their own game! When Floyd Mayweather gets in a boxing ring and some guy’s throwing punches at him, you don’t see him retreating to his corner and merely ‘condemning’ his opponent’s actions. Every time a Muslim person calls any of us ‘racist‘ – there’s that word again, the one that has NOTHING to do with what religion a person believes in – we need to turn the tables and demand they explain Why they believe its their right to kill us for not worshipping both the deity they believe in and the despotic tyrant that called himself a Messenger of God. We need to come up with a name for someone who defends their right to personal choice while so violently and arrogantly removing that same right from others. Oh wait, we’ve already got such a word, and you spell it muslim!

You need to understand that Islam is merely an offshoot of the Christian faith. The Quran is simply a rewriting of the Bible to suit one man’s twisted desire for absolute power and control of the world. If any Muslim denies that truth, then refuses to explain in a sensible way their predication to killing innocent people that don’t believe in ‘their’ God, they’re not only lying to those around them but to themselves. How dare any of them threaten to shoot Me just because I want to choose My religion, using the very same freedoms They have to choose who and what they believe?

Cue the haters, because you’re fucken stupid if you don’t realise that all Islamists want to do is to rule the world. Let me just say this: if I’m walking through a shopping centre and a camel rooting middle eastern piece of shit wants to hijack the joint, scream out “Allahu akbar!” and threaten the lives of me and my family, you can bet your ass I won’t be cowering in a corner hoping that government bureaucrats are on TV ‘condemning’ the actions of whoever-the-fuck wants to deny My freedom!

Wake up to yourselves, muppets! Stand up for your right to freely decide how to live your life and what to believe in. The Islamic extremist believes the things he does so vehemently that he’s willing to take not only his own life but that of innocent bystanders, so why the fuck aren’t You ready to fight for Your rights to walk down the street without fear that someone’s going to kill you just because you don’t want to worship the same version of God that he does?

With thanks to Hairy…

NBN – A Continuing Farce

It’s just incredible how over the last 20 years Australia has been controlled by the policies of The Coalition (Liberal + National Party) moreso than the Labor Party, and yet ordinary Australians fail to notice the complete shitfight those policies have turned the place into. If John Howard was such a revolutionary and forward thinking PM, why didn’t he give a flying fuck about the future of the nation’s telecommunications network when he was the boss? When the LNP didn’t have any policy on broadband to take to the 2007 Election, Kevin Rudd beat him with popularity and a much-publicised desire to improve Australia’s technology landscape. This catapulted the Labor Party into a position where, finally, there was a group of people actually willing to get their hands dirty and bring this country into the 21st century.

Ziggy Switkowski (as CEO of Telstra) first tried to get Howard to look into going halves with them to upgrade the national network infrastructure to fibre-to-the-node (FTTN) back before the 2001 election, when the Coalition didn’t care about broadband, and Howard laughed him out of the Lodge. Then, after Sol Trujillo took over at Telstra he tried to get the LNP to buy in on FTTN back in late 2005, and got the same, “Fuck off, we don’t care about the internet” response that Ziggy did. When Rudd took over, Sol submitted a tender to build Rudd and (Senator Stephen) Conroy’s NBN with his same FTTN plans, but because Conroy was steadfast on full fibre the deal was shot down once more. Soon after, David Thodey moved into the role of Telstra CEO and swore he’d never allow Telstra to be under the thumb of the Australian government ever again.

Thing is though, when Big Ears (Tony Abbott) took over as PM and wanted a cheaper NBN rolled out faster, Malcolm knew of Dave from his days at Ozemail while Thodey was a big wig with IBM Asia Pacific back in the late 90’s. That’s where the building blocks of the Multi-Technology Mix were first cast, due to IBM’s ties with Alcatel and their designs for digital subscriber line analog modulators that were being deployed across the world at the time, upgrading existing dial-up systems to the all-new Asymetric Digital Subscriber Line (ADSL) technology. Back in 1998, as CEO of OzEmail, Malcolm was trying to find ways to take command of the fledgling peer-to-peer ‘bulletin board’ system over dialup we had in this country, but got his ass well and truly smacked when he and his best mate Sean Howard (no relation to the former PM) tried to screw over a Tasmanian by the name of Peter Tattam. Sean and Turnbull got hold of Trumpet Winsock – the software libraries that were helping Windows PC’s connect to the all-new World Wide Web – manipulated the code a little bit to create a new type of point-of-presence server for ‘electronic mail’, called it ‘OzEmail’ and went on as if they created it. That’s why Malcolm calls himself The Father Of The Internet, even though five years after throwing his hat in the ring he sold his stake in that company for a, wait for it, 99.12% profit margin! Yep, even then Turnbull was scheming and scamming his way to the top, taking over little tech. companies along the way from his initial investment of $500,000 to a personal payout of over $57 million. And you think he cares about working class Australians that struggle from payday to payday on shithouse wages?

Here’s a few observations I’ve made about the current position this country is in with respect to the largest infrastructure project in our history:

  • Paying $11.5 billion for 30 year old privately owned telecoms infrastructure before checking to see if it actually worked, is WASTE!
  • Giving another privately owned company (Optus) $800 million for infrastructure that technology experts across the country have consistently identified as not fit for purpose, is WASTE!
  • Contracting both of those companies you bought that infrastructure from, and paying them in excess of $80 million a year for at least the next four years to repair their shoddy networks, is WASTE!
  • Spending the best part of $5 billion on reports, studies, inquiries and corporate-level salaries to your old business mates that you have under your thumb, is WASTE!
  • Buying ten year old hardware to build a cheap-and-nasty telecoms network that leaves the entire nation ranked 60th in the world for broadband speeds, is WASTE!

It is an undeniable fact that both Tony Abbott and Malcolm Turnbull are DIRECTLY RESPONSIBLE for the farce that is The National Broadband Network Project in its present state! Go ahead and carry on about what Labor did before September 2013 with respect to the NBN, but there’s factual evidence which proves beyond any doubt whatsoever that, by installing an antiquated multi-technology mix instead of sticking to Labor’s FTTP plan, the current Coalition Government made the ridiculous mistake of completely ignoring highly respected experts in economics, telecommunications and information technology from all over the world. Thing is, should you be reading this over a full fibre to the premises connection that has been installed at any time in the last five years, you only have Labor to thank simply because the Abbott & Turnbull Show have done as much as possible since September 2013 to stop the FTTP rollout. If, unfortunately, you’re on a FTTN connection, or are still waiting for the NBN to reach you, level your hatred directly at the Liberal candidate for your electorate next time you’re at a polling booth.

Australia’s telecommunications network will never be amongst the best and fastest in the world while backstabbing assholes such as Turnbull, corporate failures from the telecoms world such as Switkowski and Bill Morrow, and technically illiterate fucktards like Andrew Penn and Mitch Fifield have anything to do with it. Also, the Federal Department of Communications needs to be a single-focus entity run by someone with IT and telecoms ‘street cred’, and not just a forgotten piece of a portfolio puzzle that includes the Arts and Senate Business. Here’s hoping that the upcoming election brings a change in party, policy and personnel, allowing for Australia’s telecommunications needs both now and in years to come to get the attention that it deserves!

With Thanks to Hairy…